4 Questions Women Should Avoid Asking Men In Relationships

Hey Ladies, I know you all like dissecting what’s going on with your men and honestly that is cool but what isn’t cool is when you start asking all or any of the 4 questions below.

By the way, have you ever realized how angry a man can get when you ask too many questions at a time? When it comes to relationships, most women want to know everything that a man is thinking.
But here is the truth and from a man’s perspective, there are 4 questions I think women should really avoid asking their men while in a relationship because the answers you get are basically those aimed at pleasing you but not the whole TRUTH.

1: Do I look fat?
Most men have learned that the answer to this question is always NO. Always. No exceptions. Women and weight have too close of a bond and women often define themselves and their worth by the scale. Therefore, men are prepared and ready to say, “No, you look beautiful!” no matter what. If a woman really cares about looking fat, she should look in the mirror and decide for herself. If she feels great, then no need to ask for affirmation. But the attention-seeking woman might be desperate for compliments and turn to her man for her fix. It’s most important to be healthy, no matter what the scale says… Ladies!

2: What happened in your past relationships?
Some women become obsessed with finding out everything about their man’s past. They need to know if they measure up to ex-girlfriends or wives, if he’s as happy with them as he was before and if he’s really over a past heartbreak. You might be especially concerned about what went wrong with your guy’s previous relationships. Remember, though, he might have been a very different man then, and he probably learned from his mistakes. Try not to hold his past wrongs against him because chances are he doesn’t want to be reminded of them. He doesn’t want you to see him in a bad light.

Let him be the person he is now. Let him feel good about how he is with you, and not dragged through memories of what he did (or didn’t do) with other partners. Of course it’s important to communicate, but too much probing shows a lack of trust and confidence in your relationship.

3: Are you attracted to other women?
This comes down to self-esteem (and therefore attention) and confidence in your relationship. A man who doesn’t look at anyone or feel anything for other women is either very old, very tired, or just plain lying. Looking at and responding to others doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t find you desirable or is comparing you. Of course too much gawking or staring is inappropriate, are you going to tell me you’ve never glanced at an attractive guy?
We are all humans. If he takes it to the next level and starts to flirt, however, he’s definitely not fully committed to you and its time to reevaluate your relationship.

4: What are you thinking?
This question usually comes up in a moment of silence, and often times while in bed. Some women want to make sure that a man is thinking only of them in bed, but this is a very complicated question for a guy. Make sure you can tolerate hearing about what’s going on in your man’s mind, and remember not to assume he doesn’t care about you. You might
be amazed when he answers “Oh, just the football game yesterday.” A man’s minds can wonder to multiple subjects, while women tend to concentrate on the activity at hand and analyze every detail. Relax and take your man’s answer for what it is.

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Why Men Cheat More Than Women

Apparently, it’s not just the stuff of movies and political scandals. It seems that men really do earn their reputation for infidelity.

But what no one has bothered to figure out is why so many men have such a tough time keeping it in their pants. Are cheaters like Tiger Woods lacking in self-discipline—or so highly arouséd they can’t help but give in to temptation? Well, at long last, researchers have tackled this issue and have come up with some answers. According to a study just published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, men cheat more often than women, not because they have less self-control, but because their séxual urges are just too strong to resist.

The researchers conducted two different experiments before reaching this conclusion. In the first, 70 male and 148 female participants were asked to recall and describe an attraction to a tempting, but forbidden, potential partner. Then they answered a series of questions that measured the strength of their séxual impulse, attempts to control those impulses and the resulting behavior. Not surprisingly, the men not only experienced stronger impulses, but also acted on them more often than the women.

In the second experiment, 600 participants (326 men, 274 women) were shown a series of images of the opposite séx that were labeled either “good for you” or “bad for you,” with instructions to accept or reject them. Some trials asked them to accept the desirable images, but in others, subjects were asked to go against their inclinations and accept the undesirable ones. But regardless of the instructions, men exhibited a much stronger impulse to accept the desirable partners—and overall performed worse on the task than did the women in the study.

According to the study authors, men and women do not really differ in their levels of self control. When the men bothered to exert their self control, they were no more prone to inappropriate séxual behavior than the women. But they did exhibit stronger séxual impulses. “Overall, these studies suggest that men are more likely to give in to séxual temptations because they tend to have stronger séxual impulse strength than women do,” wrote study co-author Natasha Tidwell. 

In other words, guys apparently now have scientific validation for the old excuse, “I just couldn’t help myself.”

Source: MSN

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Stella Damascus Reveals Ways To keep Your Man

Popular Nollywood actress, Stella Damascus has come up with with a list of things that men really want and how women can keep their men. Here is what she has to say.
Now we know that the one thing men cannot live without apart from money is S&X. Wives don't deprive your husbands or they will get it elsewhere.

What men want:
-They want to feel like they are in control of things which is not bad because they are the head.
-They want to feel loved and like it or not they are our first babies who desire words of affirmation no matter how macho they seem.
They want to feel WANTED all the time, it gives them the confidence that all men crave for.
- They want to know you are still sexually attracted to them.
- They don't want you to make it obvious that you are smatter even if you are.
- They like their space and alone time.
- They don't want to come home to a fat mama who is the opposite of the sexy curvy woman he fell in love with.
- They don't want to come and hug you after work with you smelling of onions and oil. At least take a shower before he gets there or if there is no time spray perfume.
- They want to come home to a nice smelling neat and tidy home.
- They want you to be a good listener not just a talker.
- They want to know that you believe in them and you are proud of them.
- They want to know that no matter what you will have their back and support them, then ask questions later.
- They just want to see that you are making an effort because no human should expect you to be perfect.
- They don't want another mother but they want you to take care of them the way you would your kids.
- They want a wife, girlfriend, sorry to say (personal call girl) which is not a bad thing because he is your husband who is free to express his sexual desires as long as they are not life threatening or demeaning.
Think about this objectively, try out what you agree with and discard what you don't. Leave the messenger out of it for a change and see the bigger picture ahead.

Source: Nigeriafilms.com
  

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"Senators Are Fools aka Olodo, Mumu" - Tonto Dikeh

Different celebrities have been speaking up concerning the underage marriage signed by senators. Omotola has spoken , Stella Damascus has spoken, now its Tonto Dikeh calling the senators fools.
Check out what she had to say below.

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Funke Akindele Shares Location Pictures

she is currently in a movie location. More pics below:
                       

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Here Are The Things Ladies Want Their Men To Stop Doing

Dear men, here are the list of things we find unappealing about you.

When a woman loves, she loves whole-heartedly. And when a woman hates…Well complete it. Men aren’t the only ones who get turned off by some attitudes or behaviours in their spouses, women feel this way too and even though she might not voice it, she does feel it.

If you do any of the things listed below as a man, then it is time to change cos your woman is certainly not feeling it:

~Noise making: just as a man loves his woman to act like a lady, a woman also loves her boo to act like a gentleman. If you aren’t a bus driver/conductor then why in God’s name do you act like that behind the wheels? Why do you yell at every passing vehicle in traffic? Why do you raise your voice in public? Why do you create unnecessary attention to yourself wherever you go? What’s wrong with you? If your spouse isn’t a pepper seller or a local woman from your village, then trust me, she’s hating that part of you deep inside.

~Dressing: oh trust me I have seen grown men sagging. And I always wonder, are they out of their freaking minds? I have also seen grown men, walk around in clothes Wiz kid and Davido (and the rest of the music gangsters wear) would wear and it seriously makes me wonder.

You know why Wiz kid dresses the way he does? Well cos he’s wiz KID. And Davido says he’s 20 so yes, he’s still allowed to dress however.

You see my friend, when you are grown, everything including your style grows with you. You ditch the Kanye like gangster clothes for Jay Z/Dare art Alade like clothes. Yes, clothes for grown ups become your style. You ditch the saggy jeans for a clean-cut suit and dress like a grown up.

Women love that. Women love grown up men. Dressing like an adult is what is appealing to a woman.

~Dirty men: some men can wear the same underwear for days without washing them. How far na?

~Liar: a man who lies is unattractive to a woman. No woman wants to have to check everytime to know if her man is being truthful or not. There are so many important things in life that one has to worry about. A lying man shouldn’t be one of them.

~Drunk men: no woman wants a man who hangs out with his friends, gets drunk and starts acting irrational. That’s childish, that’s ridiculous and that’s unappealing.

~Overprotectiveness: yes, a woman wants you to care. No, a woman doesn’t want you breathing down her neck everytime. She needs you to trust her, back off already.

~Promiscuity: no woman in love wants to share her man. None whatsoever. If as a man you can’t keep your hands off the cookie jar, a woman would find you too risky to be with. And can you blame her?

 

Source: 360nobs

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Reasons Never to Trust your Best Friend with Your Relationship ( Man or Woman)

It is a critical topic and a point of correction for most people wh just give inn to whatever your fiance or lover tells you when u notice some signs of mistrust in him or her.

10 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER TRUST YOUR BEST FRIEND WITH YOUR MAN:

• Did you meet your guy when you were with your best friend? If so it might have been an either/or situation for him.  He might have spent months since wondering if he made the right choice, so would it really be so harmful if he just checked the one time?

• Did they hate one another at first? It’s common for a bessie to be predatory about your new man as she might fear she’s losing you to an interloper. Did you spend ages getting them to like one another? Emotions often swing from one extreme to another, meaning that hatred might easily convert to longing or lust. She might even be unwittingly trying to split you up so that she can have you back as a full-time friend.


Is dating your ex's mate a way to stay close to her?

• Are you and your best friend like peas in a pod? He loves you so what’s not to like about her?

• Were you both competitive as kids? Competitive relationships often stay competitive even when you’re adults and far too mature to show it.

•  If you’ve split with your guy and it’s been vicious he might see that dating your mate is one of the best ways to either hurt you back or to stay close to you. She might have seen him in a bid to try to help mend your relationship, but once she discovers there’s no going back will she really drop him like a hot potato? Or might she just be tempted by his ‘poor me’ charm?

• Relationships with your best friend’s man can often feel a little awkward. You’re both very close to the same girl but often edging around one another physically. It’s easy to use some joke flirting to bridge that gap and sometimes one or both forget when to stop.

• If she’s single she might seem like you back in your free spirit singleton days which could be the you he fell in love with.

• Once you’ve split it might be your best mate he contacts and whose shoulder he cries on. If she’s ever had a hard time with you she might just empathise more with him.

•  It’s easy because they already know one another. If you watch TOWIE you’ll know all about fishing in a very small pond and where it takes you.

• They already have a lot in common, namely you!



10 WAYS TO SPOT WHEN THE FLIRTING IS GOING TOO FAR:

•  When they start to develop their own tie-signs, i.e. small glances or in-jokes that you’re not privy to. These signals might be slight but they suggest intellectual intimacy that could be dangerous if you’re not included.

•  When she or he change their state when the other one is around. Does she get louder or more giggly? Does he suddenly act embarrassed at your PDAs?

•  When one of them does the eye-flick to the other. This is a giveaway flirt gesture that should always signal danger. He’ll look her in the eye to talk and his eyes will flick down to her mouth. One of the most subtle but overt flirt signals around.

•  When he watches her too long as she disappears off to the loo while you’re out.

•  If they seem to be mirroring one another’s body language without trying.

•  If they play-fight. This kind of jolly rough house joshing is often testing the parameters in terms of touch.

•  When he takes her out for a drink because you’re working late. Again.

•  When she pops round a lot when you’re working late. Again.

•  When she starts taking his side when she talks to you, suggesting he’s been offloading to her.

Can you trust your best friend with your man? Tell us over on Twitter, now

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It's Fine With Me Even If I Get Married At 58 - Actress, Uche Ogbodo

Nollywood actress, Uche Ogbodo in an interview talks about finding a man and marriage.


According to her: 'I want to be married someday. I am looking upon God for that. There is no rush in marriage; if you rush in, you rush out. And I do not even want to rush out of my future marriage'.

On getting too old to remain single "There is nothing like age in marriage. Maturity is what counts. It is fine with me. Even if I got married at 58, fine".

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10 Wrong Reasons Why People Marry

1. Good food. – Sorry, you don’t need a wife to eat good food. House-help or fast food can help.

2. s*x – This is part of reason for marriage but should not be the only reason.

3. Solution partner – It is true that you need someone you can pour your heart to at all time. But you need to know that the other person also needs your care. If all you want is only yourself to be heard without considering the other person, then what you need is a counsellor, not a husband or wife.

4. Beauty – Never marry because someone is beautiful or handsome! Beauty fades. Simplicity is the key, however you must be attracted to the person.

5. Money – You may have financial need but marrying someone just because he/she is rich won’t sustain the marriage

6. Pressure -
“I am getting old”, “My friends are all married”, “My family are complaining” – These and many more are the excuses some people marry!. But remember that you are the one that will live with that spouse and not your parents or friends.

7. Spirituality – “He speaks in tongues”, “He attend church regularly!”, we know them by their fruits and not by their being religious.

8. Conversion – I will change him/her after marriage. 99% chances are that he/she will not change after marriage if they didn’t change before marriage.

9. Fantasy – Some just get married because others are married and they don’t want to be left out.

10. Low Self Esteem – Some people feel they would not get someone to marry them, else they quickly rush in with anyone that comes their way, not knowing them to an extent.

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SEE An Apology Letter From Men To Women

Dear Women,

First of all, we're sorry. We're sorry that although we look like men, we often act like boys. We're not even sure what it means to be men anymore. As we grow up, we learn that to be happy is to be self-indulgent and self-centered. We try to make enough money so that we can have the right TV with the right video games in the right home. We want to date you and maybe even marry you but we are scared to focus on someone else instead of ourselves. Isn't it sad that we see committing to you as a potential threat to our happiness instead of a wonderful opportunity?

Here's what we don't understand: True happiness comes from being true men. We think and act like boys who don't want their toys taken away. We look up to "role models" in the media who teach us to get as much gratification out of life as possible. We may claim to be spiritual, or even firm atheists, but pleasure is the god that we worship, whether we realize it or not. Unfortunately, women tend to be just another part of our hedonistic lifestyle. Please know this: True men won't treat you like an irritating obstacle or a intimate convenience.

A real man understands that women are to be cherished and treated with care and honor. He sees marriage as the opportunity to be a real-life superhero—he leaves behind his old identity and becomes a new person, dedicated to serving his wife and children. Although he will struggle at first, a true man who marries eventually understands that he can't fit through the narrow doorway to happiness if he tries to carry all of his toys with him. There is just enough room for him and his wife, arm in arm, committed to their marriage.

Women, you can help us become real men! Most importantly, we want to feel admired by you. Help us to know that you love us just as we are, even if there is room for improvement. Do this by giving us words of validation; praise us for the things we do well. This means more to us than we let on.

In return, we will make sure that you feel loved and cherished by us. We will learn to talk with you so you can be heard and understood, not so that we can tell you how to solve your problems. We'll also try to learn to express how we feel without withdrawing or getting angry. With polished communication we can learn that what makes you happy makes us happy too! What a concept!

Once again, we're sorry. We are to blame, even though good male role models are hard to find these days. We've ignored our calling to become true men and instead act like we're in high school for as long as we can. Please trust that we are capable of more than this.

If you are frustrated with the man in your life, do your best to forgive him and start fresh. After a while, if it's clear that he will not become a real man, leave him. You deserve better.

A healthy relationship will make everyone involved feel happy. When we are happy, we are capable of living meaningful and fulfilling lives alongside one another. Thank you for your understanding and patience as we journey onward to find happiness and become real men.

Sincerely,
Men

Source

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Five Friends You Should CUT Out Of Your Life Forever

The Flake
Cancelling at the last minute, postponing until later, promising she'll be there soon and then mysteriously not responding to texts - believe me, you'll know if you're friends with a flake. (Tip: Look in the mirror and see if your face has a resigned, world-weary expression.) Not only is the process of arranging to meet up exhausting (all those emails with subjects like Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Tonight!), chances are you'll be in a bad mood with her before you even see her, which kinda makes the whole thing pointless
The Oversharer
You'll know you're mates with an oversharer if every time you hear her say your name in conversation, you leg it straight over and get ready to silence her with a manicured dig in the ribs. She re-tells your stories, blabs about that night you accidentally woke up at his place wearing an elf outfit and often accuses you of being 'SO oversensitive' if you call her on it. This is one endless broadcast you could seriously do with switching off...
The Underminer
Something about you two is similar - your career, your style, your single status maybe - but it's gone from being something that binds you to a toxic wedge. And toxic wedges (the clue is in the name) have to go. She's competitive but on the sly - a veiled compliment here, an uneasy question there... If you have a boyfriend, don't expect him to necessarily get it - women are subtly fine-tuned to detect underminers in a way that men just can't. Like how we can find the shortcut to the Ikea Marketplace. And they just can't.
The Stalker
This high-maintenance friend requires instant responses to her text messages and will happily berate you for not Liking her bikini pictures on Facebook. She assumes weekends will be spent together and books you in for what she calls 'Quality Time'. Yikes. This is a high-intensity friendship that leaves you feeling a bit like it's gonna blow any second. Unless you're happy to straddle the fear/friendship tightrope, you might want to cool it.

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Read This - 5 Things To Observe Before Sleeping

Five things to observe before sleeping.............

1 – DON’T SLEEP WITH WATCHES Watches can emit a certain level of radioactivity. Though small, but if you wear your watch to bed for a long time, it might have adverse effects on your health.

2 – DON’T SLEEP WITH YOUR BRA ON Scientists have discovered those that wear bras for more than 12hours have a higher risk of getting breast cancer. So go to bed without it.

3 – DON’T SLEEP WITH YOUR PHONE Putting the phone beside your bed or anywhere near you is not encouraged. Though some of us will use phones as alarm clocks, but please put the phone as far as possible. Scientists have proved that electrical items including mobile phone and television sets emit magnetic waves when used. These waves can cause disruptions to our nervous system. Therefore if you need to put your mobile phone near you, switch it off first.

4 – DON’T SLEEP WITH MAKE UP ON People who sleep with make up might have skin problems in the long run. Sleeping with make up will cause the skin to have difficulty in breathing and problem in perspiring. You will also need a much longer time to go into deep sleep. Lastly & most importantly,

5 – DON’T SLEEP WITH OTHER PEOPLE’S WIFE/HUSBAND What goes round comes around!!

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Three Words a man never wants to hear

Frustrated man

You may not even realize you're doing it, but saying these three little words is an instant turn-off to guys, not to mention awful for your own self-esteem. Writer Josh Aiello wants to put a stop to the pervasive phrase forever.


By Josh Aiello

If you want to turn off a guy fast, allow me to recommend three magic words. To guys, these words are the Holy Grail of annoying things girls say, the abracada bra of instantaneous mood killers, the uglier cousin to the infamous lose-lose query: "Do I look fat in this?" The three words we pray you will never say to us:
"I look fat."


Imagine the worst thing a guy could say to you (thought joggers: "I'm in love with your sister," "I killed a man..."), multiply it by 10, add a full weekend of nothing but golf on TV--and you'll start to understand just how awful it is for us to hear "I look fat" coming out of a girl's mouth, especially a girl we really like or, worse, love. Take it from my friend Adam, 34: "When a girl says she looks fat, all I think is, How can I get out of this conversation as quickly as possible? She's either fishing for compliments, she doesn't like herself, or she actually has gained weight, in which case I think, So what? Do something about it, or stop worrying and be comfortable with yourself the way you are," he says. "Whatever the reason, I'm basically like, Please, make this stop."
Now, I'm not a woman, but I'm guessing "Please, make this stop" isn't the reaction most girls are hoping for when talking to a guy. Yet that's where our brains go when we hear those three words. Here's why.

When You Say "I Look Fat," We Feel Helpless
Once we hear that, we know that no matter how many times we tell you how hot you look, you won't believe us. You've already crossed over to the dark side of deep insecurity and you're too far gone. Guys hate feeling helpless, but you already know that from that time we tried to assemble your Ikea bookshelf.


It's a Guaranteed Killer of Good Times
"As soon as a girl says those words, the night's ruined," says my friend Will, 39. "She's already feeling down on herself and in a bad mood. It's a drag." It's also totally pointless. "It's basically like saying you look ugly," says Steve, 25. "Of course, we're not going to agree. If we did, we'd never hear the end of it."
You're Planting a Seed of Doubt in Our Minds
Your guy knows you're not fat. He can see you're not fat. But the more you say you're fat, the more he'll start to question the evidence. I once dated a really pretty girl who was convinced she was overweight. She told me she thought she was fat so often that when my parents came to visit, I didn't introduce her to them. Why? Because I doubted whether what I saw when I looked at her was what other, more objective people saw. Saying "I look fat" connects you and fat in a guy's mind. And once that connection has been made, it's tough to shake.

You're Making Us Feel Insecure Too!
I get it--there's an incredible amount of pressure on women to look perfect. But it's easy to forget guys feel some of this pressure too. "When a girl says she looks fat," my friend Afshin, 24, tells me, "First I'm like, Seri ously? Then I think, Wait a min ute....Is she? Followed by, Crap, now I feel fat. I should proba bly hit the gym tomorrow." On uttering those three words, a guy goes from having a good time to wondering why the girl he's with thinks she's fat to considering whether she is fat to feeling fat himself. That's quite a plunge.
So please, the next time the urge to say those three little words hits (even if it's just a force of habit), fight it. If you think you look fat, chances are, you really don't. And even if you have gained a few extra pounds, the guy you're with probably doesn't care. So take it from a guy: Don't mention it.

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