I eavesdrop on my husband’s calls — Boy Alinco’s wife
Bayo
Bankole is known to fans as Boy Alinco. An actor on the Papa Ajasco
television series, he is married to Olayinka. They share the secret of
the 10-year-old union
How did you meet?
Bayo: We
met somewhere in Ibadan on the set of a movie and that was about 10
years ago, she came to the movie set with a small drama club from the
University of Agriculture, Abeokuta.
Olayinka: We
met at a location in Ibadan, my group organised a production and he was
invited as a guest artiste while I went as a make-up artiste. When he
walked into the set with his bow legs, people were hailing him as ‘Boy
Alinco’ and they were getting very excited over his presence. I just
moved and stood alone somewhere away from the crowd. He came to where I
was standing and told me that he liked my confidence as I was the only
person who did not come to greet him. I told him I did not have to make
noise like others. If he wanted, we could meet and talk later. That was
how we started talking.
What was the initial attraction?
Bayo: I
saw an innocent girl reading a novel by the corner while every other
person was just having fun. I discovered the innocence and the quietness
which is one of the things one requires in a woman. She is also
beautiful and I think she is brilliant too. That was what I needed to
woo her.
Yinka: It
was not love at first sight. Then there was no GSM and we communicated
through emails, so I gave him my address and he came to Abeokuta. While
we communicated, I came to understand that he had some hidden qualities
that most ladies did not know about. I observed that he was humble, God
fearing, hardworking, independent and straightforward. He is not one of
the lazy men who go around looking for quick money.
So far, how has the journey been?
Bayo: It
has been quite good and fun filled, although there has been ups and
downs, we have acquired more knowledge along the line. As a man,
handling a woman is not an easy task; it is bigger than the ambition of
becoming a millionaire. The task of being a responsible man and trying
to create a balance between the home, social life and more is not quite
easy but to God be the glory. It has been wonderful and that has been
because of the woman. I spend more time outside the home and she has
been there always. She is taking care of the kids, still running and
minding her own business. The relationship will go far because at the
beginning, we were trying to understand each other but when a
relationship goes on for 10 years it means that you have been able to
maintain stability. The long years have helped in breaking barrier of
individual differences.
Yinka: It
is God who has sustained our marriage for this length of time. I am a
woman who is connected to God and I don’t do anything outside His will. I
depend on Him for guidance, counselling and wisdom and that has been
able to help me as a woman. My husband is so plain, he has nothing to
hide. I don’t go out with him most times but I can predict what he is
capable of doing.
How do you handle the arguments and fights?
Bayo: Thankfully,
both of us are very timid, I do the shouting most times and she just
keeps quiet but once she is silent, I would try as much as possible to
resolve issues amicably and apologise whenever I am at fault. Most
times I would still want to be the man even when I am at fault, but at
the end of the day after my shouting act, I would calm down and call her
to myself.
Yinka:
He is a strong man. He will always want to assert himself. As a woman, I
will sometimes want to nag, when I start my nagging, he would be quick
to remind me of how much he hates nagging, that would make me control
myself immediately.
She stays in Abeokuta while you stay in Lagos, how do you cope with the distance?
Bayo: When I am working, I stay in Lagos but when I am not working, I am home in Abeokuta which is not far from Lagos.
Yinka: Since
we are raising the children in Abeokuta, I have always preferred to be
in Abeokuta. . If we were based in Lagos, he would still have to travel
because his job takes him to a lot of places. It is not really a
barrier. What matters is wherever he travels to, he always comes back
home and makes his family happy.
Your work involves being around a lot of females, how does she cope?
Bayo: It
does not bother her at all, not that she does not react. I could call
one lady for more than two times and my wife could just make a passing
joke about the issue and that would be all. Of course, she knows all my
male and female friends and she trusts me that I do not overstep my
boundaries. She also understands that my profession exposes me to many
people – both males and females.
Yinka: As
long as he doesn’t bring them home, I have no reason to worry.
Sometimes, I listen in on his calls and I read his messages but such
things do not affect my emotions because I have the understanding of the
kind of job he does and I know that he interacts with all kinds of
people on a regular basis.
How is the romance now that it is 10 years and there are children involved?
Bayo:
Working far apart helps the romance a lot. I can be away for a week and
during that period, my mind would be occupied with the desire to see my
family. On her part too, she is always looking forward to seeing me
whenever we are apart for a certain period of time.
Yinka: The romance is still hot and getting better. We are not tired of each other.
What does he do to make you angry?
Yinka: In the past he had the habit of shouting and that always got me very angry but these days he is learning to control himself.
Punch Nigeria
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